about flapping crane
People often ask us what we're doing this for. Well, it could be the booze. The drugs. The opportunity to avoid our spouses/significant others/houseplants for one precious day out of each week. It keeps some of us off the streets. At at least one of us would be in Sri Lanka being forced into a deadly game of life and death with a macaque right now if it weren't for the Crane.
We used to try to put up at least one skit per week. We don't do that anymore. We do what the magic 8-ball says.
Cast
Alex Kretchmer
Alex is from 183 states. He can't decide where to live, so for now it's in Minnesota, cause hey, WTF. Most recently, he wrote for the famed crappycelebrity.com and also contributes infrequently to kittenpants.com. He was also Wesley Snipes' stunt double in “Passenger 57”.
Alex will appear in skits along with Bryann, Pete, and occasionally Joe, once he gets that growth on his face taken care of. His main focus is on writing, and really his only goal is to confuse you, because that makes him laugh.
Joe Lillibridge
Long ago, Joe lived in the Southwest. Then he moved to Minnesota. He edits the skits and runs the website.
Joe is basically from Las Cruces, NM. He still thinks the weather there is way better than the weather in Minnesota.
Eric Page
Eric doesn't know how he got here or who these people are but all he really needs to know is one word: "Action!" You may remember him from the Mankato East High School Band '85 - '89. Yeah that's right. That was him. Second chair trombone until his Senior year when he was demoted to next to last chair. If that doesn't jar your memory how 'bout The First Presbyterian Church of Mankato's Youth Handbell Choir. Oh yeah...Sorry ladies...this one's already taken. Eric lives with his two kickass cats Mable and Walton (Bo Bo.) You may catch him continuing to make a complete joke of his life at many local watering holes and comedy clubs. He's opened for Frank Caliendo, Nick Swardson, Zach Galifinakis, Dave Mordal and Dave Atell just to name a few.
Eric has his own web page with his schedule, information, etc.
Bryann (Not a Girl) Schlough
Bryann (Not a Girl) is not a girl. So stop it. He has a red drum set. He works in the same building as Pete.
Bryann (Not a Girl) is doing this so old people will die faster.
Shawn Turek
Shawn was born on what most current calculations show to be the magnetic North Pole. He was raised by native Eskimo people till the age of 3 ?, when he was adopted (temporarily) by a missionary family that lived in Paris, France, Sidney, Australia, and various small towns and villages throughout Central and South America. At the age of 16, Shawn joined a small band of mutant humans with secret powers that they used to fight crime. He went on to nurture an interest in music earning three Grammy's for best musical score, and followed that up by becoming a two-time World Table Tennis Champion. Later that same year, he cracked his head on an icy sidewalk, and now just makes dumb videos.
Pete Voss
Pete enjoys talking dirty to other people's pets. When he's not working with flapping crane, he enjoys a warm soak and a good book. This week's book is called The Magic of Color which is written in brail because Pete likes a good challenge.
Crew
“Illegal” Brian McLean
Brian's often our cameraman. He sometimes does sound too. Other times, he just lights up the set with humor and gusto. We call him Illegal Brian, but for reasons we can't tell you.
Occasional Contributors and Former Craners
Rainer Camarero
Rainer is French. That much we're sure of. He helps out with sound and lighting. He sometimes appears in skits, and although he speaks English, we make him perform in French because it makes us laugh.
Sadly, Rainer is no longer an active member of the group. He went back to France. Why? Because the french language is a WMD, that's why. We'd say more, but the INS is still bugging our bathrooms.
Steph Tanner
Steph grew up in a dysfunctional family so she feels right at home at Flapping Crane.
When not cleaning toilets on the set, Steph enjoys a challenging game of Jenga and an occasional candle lit dinner with Flat Stanley.
Steph really just wants to be "one of the guys". Her operation is scheduled for August.
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